hello to blogger sphere from singlemomista

Hello there all readers,

I will take this first post to introduce myself:
I am new to single mom-hood; my divorce is still in process, and I have been living alone with my beautiful, 3 year old boy since July 2010, which is, OMG, 10 months now.  (Note to self, time is moving along, notice that you are not so distraught anymore, Wow)!  I decided to start this blog "Single Momista" to help myself continue to find my footing within this new identity of 1. artist turned mom and then 2. single mom and also to help anyone who is a few steps behind me in the process.  Hopefully, by sharing my lessons learned on my Personal Learning Curve (and there have already been many!) I will be offering insight, humor and camaraderie to other soon to be, recent or seasoned Single Momistas, artists or not.

I chose "Momista" because that name represents how I feel on the inside, despite the exhaustion, or sadness or shut down look that could be my default single mom face.  I am working through the confusion of how I ended up here, married and then divorced within 3 years, cheated on, lied to, duped, manipulated (let's focus for a moment on the "man" in manipulated, sisters), left for broke and now the full time earner for my household.  But to me, a "Momista" is a proactive, no nonsense, living her life her way, with kid in tow, kind of lady & that is how my inner fire burns on the good days.  I am not even talking sexy, libidinal inner fire, yet. I am still new to the game here, so stability takes first priority.

I am definitely In a Big Transition, but I commit to my new life at a pace that I can handle and absorb; life with a toddler can be difficult enough without adding more pressure.  It is excruciating, tedious and frightening to be In a Big Transition for what feels to me like an eternity now, but I think actually "being" in the transition is very important.  There was a time when I was so focused on dodging lies, surviving, and finding a free attorney that I could not be in anything but anger and fear.  I hope that over the course of time, my blogging entries will reflect the clarity, stability, creativity and happiness I create for myself and give evidence of me thriving in my life. Writing this blog will encourage me to accept (reflecting on that word always brings me out of fantasy and into the present moment) that I am right in the middle of a Big Transition and that I am doing my best.

Thanks for reading!
Warmly,
Elyce
aka, Singlemomista